Maybe I have fabricated this, maybe it is all in my head. This strong pull to a place I had no prior association with; no reason to be drawn to. But maybe it was all planned out before I got here - before I existed. What allows me to live by the seat of my pants is the faith that my life knows exactly what it is doing: luring me to the experiences I am supposed to have, the people I am supposed to meet, and the stuff I am supposed to learn. I breathe to feel something. And then no matter what it is - happiness, sadness, pain, joy, disappointment, relief - how can it not be lovely if it is exactly what was meant for me?
Here I am for the second time, craving all of those feelings again because the more intense the more genuine, I think. Some people miss this because they are afraid of the intensity. It is easier to feel nothing than to feel something; to stay still and content instead of unsteady and uncomfortable. But comfortable is not what I am interested in, and to me unsteadiness translates to adventure. It is easy to collect experiences and people and things that are regular. But that is not what I'm in it for.
My best advice is to do the things you want to do, and do them like you mean it.